Catgut's First Love

Catgut's First Love is a fan-made episode written by Rigsrigsrigs10918, CartoonLover, Disneydude15, and Kosh Naranek.

Premise
Catgut falls in love with a female cat named Michelle and turns to Cooler and Nose Marie for help.

Part One
(At night, in an alley, a trio of stray cats sing to a beautiful Siamese cat, who is sleeping inside a trash can. The Siamese cat wakes up and throws some garbage at the trio.)

Siamese cat: Ugh. I've heard a buzzard with asthma sing better than you three morons. Now, buzz off, will you?

Cat #1: But you're so beautiful.

Siamese cat: And I hate that. Now go away.

(The trio of cats continue singing.)

Siamese cat: And people wonder why cats sing on the fence.

(Catgut is walking home when he notices the cats and the annoyed Siamese cat.)

Catgut: So, harassing a girl cat, huh? I'll show them.

(Catgut approaches the cats.)

Catgut: Hey, bozos, back off!

Cat #2: Make us, bud!

Catgut:(cracking his knuckles) If I must.

(The cats charge at Catgut, but Catgut throws one cat over his shoulder, kicks another cat in the stomach and uppercuts the third cat.)

Cat #3: Let's get out of here!

(The cats run.)

Catgut: And don't ever come back! (turns to the Siamese cat) You okay, miss?

Siamese cat: I'm ok. Thanks. But next time, try the less violent way to deal with bullies. Two wrongs never make a right.

Catgut: Heh, you kinda remind me of my friend.

(The Siamese cat pulls the lid over her trash bin. Catgut hears his heart thumping.)

Catgut: (Thinking) That heart beat. Could it be that I'm.... in love with her?

(Catgut gently knocks on the trash can.)

Catgut: Excuse me, but what's your name?

(The Siamese cat slightly lifts the lid as her eyes are seen inside.)

Siamese Cat: Michelle. (Recloses the lid)

Catgut: Michelle...

(Scene to The Puppy Pound, where Cooler and Nose Marie are enjoying a novel. Catgut enters.)

Catgut: Cooler? Nose Marie?

Cooler: Catgut? We were in the middle of a good book. This better be important.

Nose Marie: Cooler...

Catgut: I just met another of my kind. It's like Cupid shot an arrow at the back of my neck. Her name is Michelle and I need your help.

Nose Marie: Aw. Does Catgut have a soulmate?

Catgut: Well.... (nervously laughs) In a word, yes. But...

Nose Marie: But, what? How did you meet her?

Catgut: I saved her from a trio of cats who were harassing her.

(20 Minutes later...)

Nose Marie: Ok, Cooler. I noticed some mistakes Catgut made.

Cooler: Hmm. "Catgut beat up three cats".

Catgut: Like I told you two before, they were the ones who harassed Michelle.

Nose Marie: Girls don't want to be with the violent type.

Catgut: But Michelle was thankful that I saved her.

Nose Marie: Oh. Sorry. Still...

Catgut: But then again, she might think there was a better way to deal with the bully cats... but to be honest with you two, I'm sure she would have done the same thing. I know I wouldn't want a bunch of empty-headed fur balls messing with me. But I'm sure they won't be back for a while.

Cooler: Say, why don't you bring her here? Maybe we can help her.

Catgut: Sure.

(Catgut brings Michelle to the Pound.)

Michelle: So, this must be Holly's Puppy Pound.

Catgut: You like it?

Michelle: Very impressive. Much better than that trash can.

(Cooler enters.)

Cooler: Hi. You must be Michelle.

Michelle: That's me.

Cooler: I'm Cooler, second-in-command of Holly's Puppy Pound.

Michelle: Pleased to meet you. You really think you can find a home for me?

Cooler: Of course. Absotively.

Catgut: I know the perfect family who will adopt you. They're my owners, the Bigelows.

Michelle: Ooh! I heard about them! One of them is a veterinarian and the other is the mayor of Poundsville.

Catgut: You mean Dr. Simon and Mayor Bigelow.

Michelle: Yep. By the way, Cooler, I heard you got married. May I see the lucky girl dog?

Cooler: In the morning. She went to bed. We set up a cat house for you. Look for the cat house with your name on it.

Michelle: Oh. Okay.

(Catgut watches Michelle leave while his heart beats faster.)

Catgut: Cooler?

Cooler: Yeah?

Catgut: Did you... hear my heart beating faster than usual?

Cooler: No. but it's a bit faster than usual.

Catgut: Cooler, I'm in love with Michelle. I need your help.

Cooler: well, what do you want me to do?

Catgut: Give me some dating advice, anything!

(Michelle was about to enter Her house, but listens in.)

Cooler: OK, calm down.

Catgut: Sorry.

Cooler: Here's a few starting points.

(Catgut gets out a notebook and pencil.)

Cooler: Always pay as much attention to your soulmate as possible. Also make eye contact when sharing a conversation with her.

(Catgut mutters the same sentences as he writes them down.)

Catgut: Gotcha. Now, should I dress nicely or be myself?

Cooler: Be yourself. Girls don't like fancy anymore.

Catgut: (thinking) Since when? (Aloud) Okay. Now, should I give her something nice?

Cooler: No. Start out small.

Catgut: Like what?

Cooler: Try a red rose as a welcome-to-the-pound gift.

Catgut: Good idea! I'll go get one from the garden.

Cooler: Okay.

(Catgut leaves.)

Michelle: Hmmmm.

Part Two
(Meanwhile, inside her cat house, Michelle is looking at herself in the mirror.)

Michelle: Gosh. I look terrible. Well, living in garbage cans for a while will do that. I wonder who's the groomer here.

(Catgut approaches Michelle's cathouse outside.)

Catgut: OK. Here goes.

(Catgut knocks on the door.)

Michelle: Ah. Catgut. How is everything?

Catgut: Fine.

Michelle: Does the pound have a groomer? (Notices Catgut's rose) Is that for me?

Catgut: Y-Yeah. It's my way of saying "Welcome to the pound".

Michelle: Aw... I don't know what to say.

Catgut: How about "thank you"?

Michelle: "Thank you" isn't enough.

(Michelle hugs Catgut.)

Catgut: (blushing and thinking) Wow. Is this real?

Michelle: Anyway, who's the groomer around here?

Catgut: Beamer.

Michelle: Okay. Living in a trash can do on your scent and appearance. I'll have to visit him in the morning.

Catgut: Of course. Bye.

Michelle: Thanks for stopping by.

(Michelle's heart beats faster.)

Michelle: (Thinking) What a cute guy.

(The next morning, Michelle sees Beamer opening up his salon.)

Michelle: Excuse me. You're Beamer, right?

Beamer: I am.

Michelle: Well, can you help me?

Beamer: Of course. Come in.

(Michelle sits on a chair.)

Michelle: I hear you're a professional.

Beamer: Well, you heard right, miss....

Michelle: Michelle. Michelle Langston.

Beamer: Right. Now then, would you like the special treatment or the traditional shampoo, washing, fur dry, manicure, and pedicure treatment?

Michelle: Surprise me.

Beamer: You got it. (Grooms Michelle's fur and a few minutes later...) Done. (Michelle looks at herself)

Michelle: Wow! I look good.

Beamer: You certainly do.

Michelle: Thanks, Beamer. What's the cost?

Beamer: For you, it's on the house. By the way, have you thought about getting new clothes?

Michelle: Well, I was a cat of the street. But to live in this pound, I might as well dress the part.

Beamer: Maybe they'll make some new clothes for you.

Catgut: Michelle? (comes inside with clothes for Michelle) I'm sure it's not much, but...

(Michelle puts on an orange shirt and pink pants.)

Michelle: Catgut, you're wonderful! I didn't know you sew.

Catgut: Believe me. I was born to sew.

(Michelle hugs Catgut and Catgut's ears stand up.)

Catgut: (Thinking) Whoa.

Michelle: I feel like a brand new cat.

Catgut: You sure do.

Michelle: Like.... I've been reborn.

Catgut: I'm sorry?

Michelle: After living in that trash can for so long, I just feel brand new.

Catgut: Oh! I felt the same way when I joined the Pound.

Michelle: Cool!

Catgut: Yeah. Believe it or not, I used to work for Katrina Stoneheart. She hates dogs and tried to force everyone out of the Pound. She even started hating cats after the Pound Purries came on our side.

Michelle: Gosh. I'm glad I never met her.

Catgut: In addition, she has the Stoneheart Six doing the dirty work for her.

Michelle: Well, that lady's got problems.

Catgut: But the worst out of all of them is Kaptain Kid Stoneheart, who once killed almost his entire crew because he was served squid.

Michelle: Wow. And I thought the lady had problems.

Catgut: But as long as you're in Holly's Puppy Pound, you have nothing to worry about.

Michelle: Good to know. Now, where's breakfast?

Catgut: Try the Puppy Power Cafe. Louie is the chef there. His food is tops!

Michelle: Okay.

(They go to the Puppy Power Café where everyone is having breakfast.)

Michelle: Mmm. Something smells good.

Catgut: That's today's special.

Michelle: Then, I'll have that. I don't care what it is.

Catgut: Very good.

(Louie walks up to Michelle and Catgut.)

Louie: Bonjour. May I take your order?

Michelle: Breakfast special, please.

Louie: Okay, zen. Step right this way, please.

(Louie escorts Michelle and Catgut to their table.)

Louie: Right here.

Michelle: Thanks.

(Michelle and Catgut sit down as Louie goes back into the kitchen. Michelle notices the food on Vigor's plate.)

Michelle: Excuse me, but what is that stuff supposed to be?

Vigor: They're grits. Hominy grits.

Michelle: How should I know how many? Count 'em yourself.

(Michelle laughs and Vigor has trouble getting the joke.)

Vigor(confused): I don't get it.

Michelle: "Hominy" sounds like "how many".

Vigor: Oh. Still, I've heard better.

(Michelle shrugs and waits for her food. Louie returns with a tray.)

Louie: Here eet is. Ze breakfast special.

Michelle: Mmm. Look great.

Louie: Tastes better zen eet looks.

Michelle: Oh, boy.

Louie: Oui. Bon Apetite.

Michelle(confused): Huh?

Louie: It's French for "Good appetite" or "Enjoy your meal".

Michelle: Oh. Uh, oui.

Louie: Good.

(Louie leaves.)

Michelle: I need to take a French class.

(Michelle starts eating.)

Michelle: Mmm! Heavenly.

Catgut: I knew you would like his cooking.

Michelle: Why didn't I find this place earlier?

Catgut: Why didn't you?

Michelle: I guess I never heard of this place.

Catgut: Oh.

Michelle: Hey, aren't you gonna order anything?

Catgut: Eh. Not hungry.

Michelle: Oh. Oh well, more for me.

Catgut: I guess.

(Michelle happily finishes her meal.)

Michelle: Oh boy. I haven't eaten like that since...well, I can't remember when.

Catgut: Mainly because you had to eat scraps back in the alleyways?

Michelle: Yes. I had limited choices.

Catgut: Sounds rough.

Michelle: You can say that again. Well, that was good. Now, I'm gonna go see what there is to do around here.

(Michelle gets up and leaves. Catgut watches her go.)

Catgut(thinking): So far so good.

Part Three
(Michelle walks around the Pound looking for something to do.)

Michelle: Hmm... Let me see. Surely, they must have games and activities here.

(Igor walks up to her.)

Igor: Hi. You must be new here.

Michelle: Yeah. Say, are there any games or activities anywhere around here?

Igor: You should check out the pound's arcade room. It's top notch.

Michelle: No way. You have an arcade?

Igor: Yep!

Michelle: Show me, please.

Igor: Right this way, please.

(They arrive at the arcade.)

Michelle: OK. What was I eating?

Igor: Oh, this is real.

Michelle: (Looking at an arcade machine) Is that Avenue Fighter 2?!

Igor: Yep. This ain't no dream. Go on. Try it.

(Michelle does so.)

Michelle: Wow! This is fun!

Igor: It's one of my favorites.

Michelle: Wanna play with me, Iggy?

Igor: Count me in.

(Igor joins.)

Michelle: Prepare to be surprised.

(They play the game.)

Igor: Wait. What do you mean "surprised"? I've played this game 87 times.

(Michelle then looks at Igor.)

Michelle: You have?

Igor: Yep.

(Suddenly, the "Game Over" theme plays.)

Igor: Oops.

Michelle: Don't worry. We can start over.

Igor: Okay.

(Michelle restarts the game.)

Michelle: Here we go.

Igor: Yep.

Michelle: Okay, better watch out, Iggy.

Igor: Oh yeah?

Trivia
This fan-made episode marks the first appearance of Michelle.